Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Tagged With Additional Questions

I was notified that The Fat Cyclist responded to my Six Random Things About Me post, in which I blatantly tagged him. I guess in the end he mercilessly tore apart the whole plague that is the tagging phenomena and chose to devise his own intelligent questions, which he answered himself first.

And then he sneezeth and James @ Bicycle Design, among many, caught-eth the cold. The epidemic has been passed on to me.

Anyway, the questions are very bike related and since these two gentleriders chose to put their effort into answering them, I might as well too.

Here goes. Music first right? Ready..?

Q. If you could have any one — and only one — bike in the world, what would it be?

A. I like my bike with a no nonsense traditional top tube. Sloping tubes feel like they've just broken their back to accommodate me. I'll get any bike with a proven geometry and lets me achieve my goals. Okay, I'm getting too philosophical here. Colnago has been something I've always wanted to try. I respect the name, their ISO Certification, their proven geometry...why else would they have the same specs for every bike? It feels good to be part of a long tradition, doesn't it?

Q. Do you already have that coveted dream bike? If so, is it everything you hoped it would be? If not, are you working toward getting it? If you’re not working toward getting it, why not?

A. I ride plenty of miles, and if I had a choice, I would have a "stable" of bikes...50...maybe 100 of them for each occasion, to ride on my whim on any day I like. Life is all about balance. I guess you could dream all you want, but you have other priorities as well.

Q. If you had to choose one — and only one — bike route to do every day for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?

A. The Stelvio Pass in Italy. Gorgeous and painful, its like sex and death.

Q. What kind of sick person would force another person to ride one and only one bike ride to do for the rest of her / his life?

A. Elden The Fat Cyclist. No... but I'd ride my favorite bike all my life. You did provide tools, grease and lube for maintenance, right? Non problemo, chico!

Q. Do you ride both road and mountain bikes? If both, which do you prefer and why? If only one or the other, why are you so narrowminded?

A. Road for now and sparsely into mountain biking, whenever I can. I'm narrowminded now?

Q. Have you ever ridden a recumbent? If so, why? If not, describe the circumstances under which you would ride a recumbent.

A. I feel its for older folks. Maybe when I become 50, loose a couple of disks from my back, and my ass cant take a saddle this long and this wide, I'll think about it.

Q. Have you ever raced a triathlon? If so, have you also ever tried strangling yourself with dental floss?

A. I definitely don't want to tarnish my image, be it doing a triathlon or strangling myself with Fluoride and bleach, the last things I want sitting in my mouth before I die.

Q. Suppose you were forced to either give up ice cream or bicycles for the rest of your life. Which would you give up, and why?

A. Thats apples and oranges for me. Do you ride your ice cream? Yuck, don't even hint at your weird fetishes.

Ok here, suppose you gave up on ice cream and chose bicycles. Suppose I gave up on bicycles and stuck with ice cream. Then we can trade whenever we please. Fair enough?

Q. What is a question you think this questionnaire should have asked, but has not? Also, answer it.

A.. Sweet Mary, its asked all the questions, thank you very much!

Q. You’re riding your bike in the wilderness (if you’re a roadie, you’re on a road, but otherwise the surroundings are quite wilderness-like) and you see a bear. The bear sees you. What do you do?


1. Dismount the bike, and give a speech to the bear on the health benefits and efficacy of cycling, rather than just crawling about on all fours, wasting energy.

2. Throw him my Cliff Bars. Don't tell me bears don't like the best bike food in the world. Who knows, maybe the bear would get into cycling after his experience...

3. Do a wheelie and pretend to be a horse.. a weird mutant horse to say the least.

If all fails.... ,

4. Take dog spray and apply it in my eyes so I wouldn't see my limbs being torn apart (thanks Blue).

Q. Now, tag three biking bloggers. List them below.

, Ron, and Ron. These are 3 bloggers I know very intimately. Ooops, looks like all of them answered the above questions at once.

Now that was pretty darn neat wasn't it?

Tagging plague closed.


Donald said...

Good Answers Ron... I love your one road choice. Awesome shot!

James said...

Yep, the Stelvio Pass is a great answer. I would be happy to get to ride it just once.